Posted by: Kristin W | February 24, 2012

We’re Going to Africa

We are going to Ethiopia!  We will be leaving tomorrow and will return home on March 7.

We wanted to take a moment to thank all of you for your support over the past many months (OK, years…) during the long adoption process. It means so much to us that you have all been so supportive and encouraging.  We are really lucky to bring two kids into an environment where so many people care about them already.

We also wanted to explain a few things regarding attachment and an adopted child. We have been advised by our social workers, adoption experts and doctors that A and H will need some transitioning time once they are home with us. Although we know everyone is eager to meet them, we will be spending the first few weeks at home without visiting or having visitors at our home.

There are a few reasons for this.  A & H will need time to form a bond with us as their parents and siblings. They will need a few weeks at home with only us as their caregivers, tending to all of their needs. They have lived in an orphanage in a communal setting without a main caregiver for a while now, and we want them to understand that they can count us to meet their needs in the future. They have not had the opportunity to form attachments and it will take some time for them to settle into family life. They will be leaving all they have ever known, and will need time to grieve and adjust to being in our family. Some children adjust right away, other children need more time. Until we get to know their personalities better, we won’t know how they will react to meeting new people right away.

Please understand that if we don’t come around often, or let you hold our child at first, it is not personal. We are just trying to do what we feel is best for our new family members. This method of parenting might seem different to you, but please undersstand that we will need to parent A & H differently than a child biologically born to us and that we know what we are doing. Your support means a great deal to us at this time and we really value all of you!

If you would like to help, our fabulous friend Christie has set up a way to bring us dinners.  Click here to sign up.  Right now, that is the best way to help us spend more time with the kids.  We will also be updating facebook as we can, and I’ll try to blog about our adventures, but don’t expect too much.  After all, I am the mom of FOUR KIDS now!

Thanks for all the well wishes.  Let the adventure begin…

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Responses

  1. This is such a well-written, clear post, and I may borrow from it heavily when our Embassy trip comes up.
    You are going to be such a great mom to A and H. It was a pleasure and honor to meet them in Addis. We’ll be thinking of you non-stop over the next few weeks.
    Send pictures soon. Of your kids and ours.
    Safe travels!

  2. To echo what Kyra says, I want to share this with all my family and friends when we get to bring our daughter home. It is eloquent and honest. The kind of mother you will be and family your children will enter into. Safe travels on your journey.

  3. So well said, Kristin. Truly.

    Sending much love to all of you ;]

  4. Lovely and so, so right. The first weeks, well months really, are going to be unbelievable. Good. Bad. Amazing. Scary. Exhausting, Unforgettable. I cannot wait to hear all about your trip, how S and E enjoy their time in Addis, the birth family visit, plane ride home (he he he) and share pictures. Lots and lots of pictures. You may not blog for awhile, at least I didn’t our first couple months home…but hopefully we’ll connect on the phone or via FB. Have a safe and wonderful trip. I’ll be thinking of you.

  5. So well said, Kristin. Truly.

    Sending many thoughts of love to you, and to your five other family members!

  6. Safe travels and congratulations! Don’t hesitate to reach out to all of us if you need anything.

    Enjoy the journey. I already look back with nostalgia on our first few months.

  7. Have a great trip!

  8. We are leaving next week to bring our daughter home. This is exactly the same message we want to convey to family and friends. You stated it so eloquently. Good luck!


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